If only You knew
by Shinku Seishin
Summary: Modern College/6th Form AU in which Annie is a disturbed teenager just trying to survive in her ever darkening world. But a certain black haired girl will turn Annie's already twisted world on it's head as she struggles with her past and the turbulent emotions inside her heart. Rated M for later chapters!
1. Chapter 1

Hi this is my first story here and my first attempt and something longer then a few paragraphs.. I hope you like it even though this might feel a little rushed. There will be more coming soon! C: And all feedback is welcome and encouraged.

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><p>Annie's eyes flicked open, the same white ceiling coming into view yet again. Dreading for what was coming in the day ahead she pulled herself out of bed. While walking to the closet to retrieve her clothes she caught herself in the mirror. Standing there her face framed by her dull golden hair, her well toned body littered with ugly scars. She turned away, disgusted with the image of herself and pulled on the clothes she would wear, the clothes she almost always wore. A black pullover hoodie and tight black skinny jeans.<p>

Hearing a car horn outside towards the window, she smiled a bit when she saw Reiner. Friends since practically birth the two of them shared an unbreakable bond of friendship. Reiner was the only person who knew just how broken Annie was under her tough shell. Picking up her bag from the messy floor and slipping in her shoes, Annie left the empty house with a sigh of relief.

"Thought you were never getting out of bed" Reiner smiled as she approached him down the narrow path that cut through her overgrown front garden. Giving Reiner nothing but a look she slid gracefully into the front passenger seat. To a passerby who didn't know the two might of thought the look was odd and menacing, but Reiner knew exactly what Annie meant, _Please not today_.

As they drove towards the collage that both had somehow managed to enrol into, Reiner selected a mix CD that he knew Annie loved, a mix of songs from Linkin Park, All Time Low, Green Day and Bring Me The Horizon. When Linkin Park's Numb started blasting through the car's speakers, Annie smiled to herself, remembering just how well Reiner knew her. The drive to the collage was short and Annie could of walked the distance but Reiner knew better then to let Annie walk long distances by herself.

Pulling up into a parking space where a particular raven haired girl was sitting on a wall, waiting for her friends. Reiner frowned when he saw the girl and glanced over at Annie, who's facial expression was a mix of fear and sadness. Staring through the slightly tinted windshield Annie could not tear away her gaze. _Not her please, not today not any day please!_ Annie was screaming inside her head. Her head snapped around when a concerned looking Reiner grabbed her arm. "Come on you can get through this Annie, you always can" he encouraged her. Swallowing Annie gave him a short nod to try and put his worries at ease, _why am I reassuring him? I'm the one who needs help. _With a deep breath Annie climbed out of the car, doing her best to avoid looking at the raven haired girl sitting on the wall, the raven haired girl who had been the object of both her love and hate ever since she could remember. Annie walked slowly into the building with Reiner following close behind, trying to rid her mind of all her feelings and focus on the dreary world around her.

Maths and Science drifted by uneventfully, during break all Annie did was hang around with Reiner and his friends behind the main building, they mostly smoked and made fun of each other while Annie sat there quietly, headphones blocking out the world around her.

Annie's heart sank when she realised what lesson was next, Physical Education. For the most part she enjoyed the class, if she could keep her skin covered she had no real problems, except one.

Stepping into the changing room Annie's heart warmed and froze when she saw her, the raven haired girl. She didn't dare think of her name. "Hi". Did Annie imagine that? No someone had defiantly said that, but no one ever spoke to her. "Hi..?", there it was again, it came from her left. Turning her head slowly Annie's eyes fell onto the face of the raven haired girl. Her eyes widened at the girl in front of her, she wanted to do many things in that moment, run away, curl into a ball and hide, kiss those lips that were so close and looked so soft and beautiful... but Annie's body refused to move, "Annie? Are you okay? It's me Mikasa" Annie flinched at her name. _Please just let me suffer alone, but I still want you so bad_. "H-hi" Annie managed to choke out, much to the amusement of the goddess in front of her.

"I haven't seen you in a while, where have you been all this time?" _Fucking you inside my head_, Annie thought and then blushed a deep crimson. "O-oh y-ya know just around.." Annie trailed off getting lost in Mikasa's black as night eyes.

"Well I think it's time we got to know each other again" _Shit _" Ya know, like a few years ago except without all that stupid constant competition Mikasa offered. Annie's eyes brightened at the idea but dimmed again at the prospect of having to torture herself around Mikasa while the other girl didn't know her true feelings. _If only you knew.._


	2. Chapter 2

Annie was deep in thought and didn't notice the volley ball speeding towards her head until it smacked into her temple. Blacking out for a few seconds, Annie opened her eyes to the faces of her classmates and the harsh light of a florescent tube light attached to the ceiling.

"Wha-what happened?" she mumbled out to the 3 different Krista's she saw in front of her. _That's not right is it? Isn't there only one Krista?_ Dazed and confused, Annie sat up and instantly a wave of nausea overcame her and she had to hold down what little food was contained in her stomach.

"No no just sit there Annie don't try to move" _Was that Mikasa's voice? I love the sound of her voice, it's like honey in my ears.. _Annie was not aware that what she was thinking she was also mumbling out loud, much to the pleasure of Mikasa who was sitting right by her, keeping her steady. Leaning down to Annie's ear Mikasa softly whispered, "If my voice is that nice why don't you ever let me talk to you?" Annie's clear blue eyes widened in horror, realising with dread that she had in fact, been speaking her thoughts aloud. Turning to stare at the beautiful smile of the raven haired goddess before her, Annie's eyes rolled back and she slipped into the dark embrace of unconsciousness.

Annie's eyes flicked open. Seeing only a dark, blank ceiling above and crisp white sheets over her body. Slowly she attempted to move her head to the side, feeling the throbbing pain bounce around inside her skull and groaning out loud. Taking a deep breath and bracing herself against the coming pain she managed to shift her body onto her side. She froze as she noticed the other girl in the room watching her every move. It took Annie's eyes a few seconds to focus onto the figure sitting before her. Realising that the girl who had watched her sleep was Mikasa, her blood ran cold and her eyes grew in shock.

Mikasa, noticing Annie's shocked expression, smiled and very gently brushed a lock of golden hair out the shorter girl's face and behind her ear, stroking the side of her head very delicately. As if she was the most fragile object in the world. "I'm sorry about your head" she whispered apologetically, smiling almost sadly. Mikasa seemed to shift a little on the chair, as if nervous or uncomfortable, very slowly she leaned her head down towards Annie's and softly kissed her cheek. Whispering lowly into Annie's ear Mikasa asked if she had any bad feelings towards her because of what had happened. Annie shook her head.

"Wuh-why ar-are you huh-huh-here?" Annie asked stuttering nervously, mentally chastising herself for acting so out of character. Mikasa smiled at the still confused blonde. "Well Annie I wanted to watch over you while you slept" Her cheeks reddening slightly. Annie's cheeks flushed red at Mikasa's confession, laying her head back down to the pillow she closed her eyes and sighed.

"Mika.." Mikasa looked up at the use of her old nickname, wondering why Annie would choose to use it now. "Do y-you like me?" Smiling, the girl leaned down once more, and planting a gentle kiss onto Annie's pale lips, whispered in response. "Does that answer your question?"


	3. Chapter 3

In the several days since Annie and Mikasa's confessions to each other, the former had been recovering from her rather over the top volley ball injury. Mikasa visited her on several occasions, leaving flowers and chocolates for the short blonde.

Finally Annie was allowed to return home from her short stay in hospital. Reiner was prompt in arriving to take Annie back to her house, and wanted to stay as little as possible in the hospital out of fear of being recognised as he had several stays for injuries sustained while fighting. Despite his wanting to keep a low profile, Reiner made a big show of picking up Annie and carrying her out of the hospital's lobby bridal style.

Once Annie was back in her dark, empty house she sighed heavily. Wishing that her father was still around. Falling heavily back onto the couch and opening the Sonos control app on her phone, she started to fill the room with music. She smiled at the small speaker in the corner of the room here the music was being played from and silently thanked Bertholdt had given her for her 16th birthday.

Even though music was pumping throughout the room Annie still didn't feel quite comfortable. Wondering what it was that could possibly be bothering her she sighed once more. Reaching again for her phone she brought up her text display and quickly tapped out a message to Mikasa. _"I'm so bored.. do you want to drop by my house today?" _Minutes went by as Annie waited for her reply. Just as Annie had about given up , her phone rang out a quite ding sound. Grabbing the phone excited, Annie smiled at the text she had received. _"Sure I'd love to! I'll be right there, 3 Maria lane right?"_ Annie confirmed the address and put down her phone smiling happily. It was only then that she realised she was still wearing the dirty clothes from her stay in the hospital and thundered up the stairs to her room.

Mikasa stood on the doorstep of Annie's old and slightly beaten down house. She felt nervous standing there, dressed in her signature scarf, a Bring Me The Horizon shirt and a pair of boot cut jeans. She wasn't sure whether to knock or to text Annie, telling her she had arrived. This didn't matter though as the door in front of her opened, Annie had been waiting on the other side. What Mikasa saw standing beyond the threshold of the door was a beauty so unmatched by anything she had seen before, she almost mistook her for a dream.

Annie stood there, half hiding behind the door waiting for Mikasa to step inside. _Why is she just standing there staring?_ Annie wondered, slightly irritated. Leaning forward she grabbed Mikasa's hand and pulled her inside, quickly shutting the door behind her. Mikasa seemed surprised at being woken from her daze but smiled when her eyes settled onto Annie again. Annie blushed, noticing how Mikasa stared at her body, the look in her eyes seemed almost..horny.

"Duh-Do you wanna go to the living room?" Something in Annie's voice faltered and she silently cursed herself for it. The last thing she wanted was to look stupid in front of the girl she admired the most.

Mikasa smiled at Annie's nervous tone, and trying to make her feel more comfortable thought best to just do as she said without a word. Stepping through the first door in the hallway, Mikasa came into a small, cosy if a bit messy, room. She thought that it seemed like a lovely place to relax. It felt..homey. Sitting down onto the couch facing the small TV in one corner the dark haired beauty smiled up at the timid blonde. "Well, what are we going to do then?" Annie frowned uncertainly, noticing Mikasa's shirt she had an idea. Sitting down next to Mikasa she pulled out her phone and started playing Bring Me The Horizon's Can You Feel My Heart? She looked up, slightly uncertain of Mikasa's reaction and smiled when she saw her beaming face.

"I love this song!" Mikasa squealed a little over-excited, which Annie thought was a little out of character for her. Mikasa, again acting out of character, pulled Annie into a tight hug which surprised the blonde. "Are you okay Mikasa?" Annie hugged her back, slightly worried about the taller girl's sanity. "Yeah, yeah I'm sorry, it's just I never thought we would have such similar tastes in music" Mikasa smiled at Annie in a way that made her chest tighten, and the area between her legs to grow warmer.

"Hey, I have an idea" Mikasa kept smiling as she leaned in towards Annie, stopping just short of her face, their noses touching gently. "An-and what would that be?" Annie swallowed, slightly nervous at being so close to the girl she had fantasised about. "I'm glad you asked.." Mikasa gently pushed her lips into Annie's, the latter moaning quietly at the sudden touch. A sudden need overtook Annie as she pushed back against Mikasa passionately, wanting nothing more than to just be so close, so intimate, with this spectacle of utter beauty. Mikasa's tongue ran across Annie's lip, silently asking for entry to which Annie's lips quickly opened, allowed access to her wet mouth.

Annie leaned back on the couch, pulling Mikasa on top of her but never breaking contact with her lips. Slowly snaking her arms around Mikasa's waist she silently gave in to the statuesque goddess, giving her full control. To which Mikasa pulled away, sitting up between Annie's legs breathing heavily. Annie sighed heavily at the loss of her touch and looked up, staring into those mysteriously dark eyes.

Mikasa smiled, "I think it's time we took this to your bed, don't you?"


End file.
